SHOCK belts out another episode recap of SCREAM QUEENS.
The dean takes the promised meeting with Grace, but doesn’t recall promising to tell her anything about the bathtub baby. She goes home and takes a shower. The setup is like PSYCHO, with the Red Devil approaching like Mother Bates. But Jamie Lee isn’t the victim like her mother; it is all a ploy. She appears behind the Devil and smashes his head into the wall. “I’ve seen that movie like 50 times!” The dean runs into the other room and calls 911, but gets an automated message. She hangs up when the Devil appears with a knife, and faces off against him with a fireplace poker. Dean Munsch holds her own, but then a second Devil appears, this one with an axe. To the dean’s surprise, a third killer joins the fray, this one in an Antonin Scalia mask. The dean gives a lengthy – and boring – monologue about how a former lover taught her Thai blood sports, and she kicks all of their asses. When she fights Scalia, she spouts off against his more ridiculous court decisions. All three killers end up running scared.
The next day, the dean meets with Grace once again, deciding that, now that the killers have come for her directly, it is time to be a little more helpful. She gives Grace the name of the Kappa who died birthing the baby: Sophia Doyle. Grace doesn’t believe it; her dad told her her mother’s maiden name was Mulligan. She is disappointed. She takes this info to Pete and start running a search on Sophia Doyle, but they can’t find anything. They need a new strategy and jump to a whole bunch of conclusions about the Hag of Shady Lane. Since she was the one who took the baby, and she was crazy, she would probably end up in a sanitarium. They go back to the asylum where Dean Munsch was being held. Picasso, the woman who painted them unrealistically fast when they were last there, offers them a painting of Gigi, based on absolutely zero information. When Grace mentions the woman would have had a baby with her, Picasso presents a painting of Gigi holding two babies, a boy and a girl.
Grace goes straight to Gigi with the painting, demanding answers. She found out that Gigi lied on her resume and she dropped out of Wallace University as a sophomore for “medical reasons.” Gigi throws some dime-store therapy at her, thinking that this is Grace’s way of dealing with her dad’s new relationship. To make matters worse, Gigi has a bombshell for Grace: Wes proposed. She reveals a teeny, tiny diamond engagement ring as proof. Grace goes straight to Wes, who is confused about what happened. The way he tells it, Gigi went to the mall to pick up some stuff for his place, like lamps and decor-type things. She came home with an engagement ring and Wes decided to play along so he could have mind-blowing sex. He promises Grace he won’t actually get serious with Gigi without talking to her first. Grace starts putting the pieces together, realizing that Gigi would have known her mom in college, which means Wes would have known her then. She runs from the house, scared and crazed, and Wes looks at himself evilly in the mirror. I think this is supposed to suggest he is one of the killers, but I honestly don’t believe he is.
During all this, Grace has missed the drama o’ the moment at Kappa house. The Chanels have offered Denise (who is now living in the house, in #2’s room) $3 million in exchange for proof that Grace and Zayday are the killers. Denise starts her investigation with Jennifer, who has nothing bad to say about Zayday… then she remembers a story Zayday told her from high school, when the rich, popular girls lured her into their clique only to make fun of her. Zayday said that on that day, she would find a way to get real revenge against rich girls. Zayday overhears all this, confronts Jennifer and Denise, and warns them to leave her alone.
Denise goes to talk the Chanels into giving her an advance on the $3 million, to cover expenses. While she is doing that, the Red Devil kills Jennifer while she is recording her vlog. Denise and the Chanels head downstairs and find Jennifer seated upright on the table, covered in lit candles and melted wax. She is very dead.
The dean gives a press conference, announcing she is shutting down the campus indefinitely. “Congrats, Red Devil – you have won.” Hester and Chanel #4 lead a memorial for Jennifer while Chanel is at the Kappa house, screeching about how with school shut down, her whole life is ruined. She has a pair of Scotland Yard officers in the living room, demanding that they investigate, and insinuating that she will pay any price to see Zayday and Grace go to prison. The whole scenario is ridiculous: Chanel got them there by making death threats against the Duchess of Cambridge. Nonetheless, the officers investigate and find that Chanel #5 is her best suspect. She spends a lot of time on the Dark Web and hosts numerous chat rooms where the topic of conversation is always the best way to kill her roommate. Chanel doesn’t care about any of that; she wants proof that Grace and Zayday are killers. The cops don’t have any proof, but they do give her a file with Grace’s mom’s criminal record.
When Grace returns to Kappa house, Chanel confronts her with what Scotland Yard found. Grace’s mother was Kappa president in 1995, the girl in the blue dress who was dancing obsessively to TLC’s “Waterfalls” in the first episode. She hooked up with Wes at the party and nine months later Grace came along, and her life fell apart. She changed her name from Bethany Stevens to Mary Mulligan, and has a rap sheet that includes multiple felonies including theft, drunk driving, and dealing meth. Wes had to sue for sole custody of Grace, and a year later, she died in a drunk driving accident. “You aren’t the baby in the bathtub. Accept that your mom was just a drunk, degenerate slut.” Grace slaps her and leaves. She confronts Wes with what she has learned, and he confirms that what Chanel said was true. Wes burned down their house to cover any evidence of Grace’s mom’s sordid past. “I committed arson to protect you!” he insists, as if that is something to be lauded. He planned to tell Grace the truth one day, but that day never came. Grace reminds him that she is her mother’s daughter and that he should stay away if he wants to protect himself. As soon as Grace leaves, Gigi enters with fake concern for Grace. She is failing out of school, and starting to lose her mind. Gigi suggests Wes take real action… maybe even committing her.
Now that she is living in the Kappa house, Denise has appointed herself house mother and is wearing Chanel #5’s clothes. She takes Chanel aside and chastises her for insulting Grace’s mother. She wants Chanel to apologize, and when she refuses, she threatens to go back to having sex with Chad. Chanel agrees – angrily. She meets Grace for coffee and tries to bond with her over their horrible mothers. Chanel’s mother wouldn’t let her attend her own graduation because she had a zit so big she thought it would bring shame on the family. The girls don’t quite bond, but Grace does accept her apology.
We finally see Boone, the guy who faked his own death in the second episode. He is at the gym when he gets a call. “All I do is work out and kill people,” he whines to the person at the end of the line. It turns out that Gigi was dressed as Antonin Scalia, and Boone is worried she is ruining their “brand.” He wants to kill Gigi, then finish what they planned.
This was a tough episode to slog through. There were a lot of pointless asides and mini-flashbacks that were maybe supposed to be funny… but they weren’t. It felt like this episode jumped to more conclusions than usual and ultimately was just there to pad out the episode order.
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