Wanna See Something Insane? Here’s INTESTED!

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Wanna See Something Insane? Here’s INTESTED!

SHOCK goes looking for the weirdest stuff on the internet and finds INTESTED.

If it’s weird ye be seeking, look no further than INTESTED.

I’m not sure if we can call it a film, it just…is.

The work is the product of the Toronto-based horror movie-makers and fans at RabidDog Films, a gaggle of lunatics (made up of Phil Pattison, “Cannibal” Cam Schwarz and FX wizard Carlos Hernriques) who set out to make some kind of ongoing audio/visual melting pot of odd imagery and antics all centered around their love of exploitation cinema and absurdity.

The result is INTESTED.

Again, I am not sure what to make of any of this. And that’s why I like it.

Check out the first two installments of the series (?) and see what you think. Actually, try not to think. Just absorb the madness…

For more on INTESTED and the world of RabidDog Films go to their official site.

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Wanna Own All Rights and Elements For RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD 5?

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Wanna Own All Rights and Elements For RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD 5?

Hey, kid! Wanna buy a zombie movie?

SHOCK stumbled upon this interesting Ebay auction in which the producers of the 5th (and arguably worst) RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD sequel, Ellory Elkayem’s 2005 thingie RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD: RAVE TO THE GRAVE, are selling off the entire cannibalistic kit and caboodle.

That’s right, according to the auction, the producers don’t have the space to keep the remains of the flick – including all elements, laboratory materials, negatives, prints etc.- so they’re taking it to Ebay in hopes that some hardcore horror fan will snatch it up for the bargain sum of $50,000 USD…or best offer.

RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD: RAVE TO THE GRAVE is the direct sequel to Elkayem’s other Romanian shot ROTLD flick, NECROPOLIS. The tie in to the series is the Trioxin gas and brain eating. Otherwise…yeesh.

Full disclosure: I do not like this film.

But maybe you do. Maybe you wanna make them an offer that they can refuse but might not. Why not try your luck HERE.

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In Defense of LAND OF THE MINOTAUR

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In Defense of LAND OF THE MINOTAUR

SHOCK sticks up for the unloved British/Greek horror film LAND OF THE MINOTAUR.

Sometimes I feel that there are certain pictures out there that I and I alone am in love with, that are speaking exclusively to me. I say this because it seems like everyone else with a pulse is either oblivious to the following flick or has callously deemed it to be dung. The strange sliver of celluloid of which I so highly speak – and again, so effectively speaks to me – is Kostas Karagiannis’s earthy 1976 shocker THE DEVIL’S MEN, known to us schmucks on North American shores as LAND OF THE MINOTAUR.

Released in 1977 in the U.S. by exploitation house Crown International to a moderately successful box office take, LAND OF THE MINOTAUR has been pretty easy to find on home viewing formats, popping up in rough looking pan and scan VHS versions and dodgy DVD releases here and in equally ugly (but thankfully uncut) videos in the UK. Scorpion Releasing even let it loose a few years back as a split disc with Norman J. Warren’s TERROR, uncut and in widescreen under it’s the DEVIL’S MEN title with little to no fanfare. Sadly, I’ve still yet to hear anyone else champion its virtues.

So, with that, I do believe it’s time to do so.

On the outskirts of a remote, inland village in beautiful, picturesque Greece (Aris Stavrou’s photography is stark and eye-filling), something secret, insidious and palpably evil lurks, sucking every too-curious young tourist into its maw and swallowing them whole. As the ever-expanding list of the curious missing travelers increases, an eccentric local Priest (the great Donald Pleasence, a year before he ran raving ‘round Haddonfield) begins to suspect that a cult of mountain dwelling, black hooded, Minotaur worshiping Satanists have gained a stronghold, sacrificing every pretty young thing in their path to their titular stone hoof and horned, steam belching deity.

A battle of theological wits ensues between the fraught Father and the ultra-wicked village Magistrate/covert cult leader Baron Corofax (the perhaps even greater Peter Cushing in rare, full-on chin-stroking villain mode) and by the time the smoke clears and the last drop of crudely spilled virgin blood dries, only one of these admirably dedicated and faithful men will be left standing.

A British/Greek co-production, LAND OF THE MINOTAUR was indeed initially released in the UK under its original title as the sexier and bloodier THE DEVIL’S MEN and, after getting a few bits of PG-rating-ensuring blood and boob action removed, spat out stateside under its more lurid moniker. Slapped with one of the more outrageous, colorful and almost entirely misleading exploitation movie posters of the 1970’s (Half Man! Half Beast! Trapped in a Land Forgotten by Time!), the picture was wedged onto the bottom half of a Crown double bill, pulling in the pundits who were expecting an action packed genre picture, before fading into B-movie oblivion, relegated to after-hours TV showings and budget video waste bins everywhere.

I first saw LAND OF THE MINOTAUR during one of my indiscriminate Friday night teenage video rental binges in the mid 80’s, duped, just like that legion of kids in 77, by that beautiful, busy cover graphic. And though I did not get the promised epic I had hoped for, what I did get was something far darker, stranger, solemn, moody and bizarre; a picture that had a suffocating ambiance and dream-like atmosphere.

LAND OF THE MINOTAUR is a picture that demands an open mind and perhaps more importantly, an open ear. See part of the shuddery secret of the film, outside of the engaging lead turns from veteran British horror pros Cushing and Pleasence (working together here for the first time since 1960’s masterful ‘Burke and Hare’ drama THE FLESH AND THE FIENDS, another of my personal favorites), is an absolutely first rate experimental low frequency electronic score by the iconic composer/pop guru Brian Eno. The former Roxy Music mastermind coats this slowly-paced film with speaker throbbing drones, eerie synthesizer washes and pulses that render it almost meditative. It’s a case study for any serious horror movie minded music maker on how to milk unease out of imagery and the fact that this score isn’t available in any isolated form on CD or vinyl or anything is a very serious cinematic crime that will hopefully one day be rectified.

I really like LAND OF THE MINOTAUR. Make no mistake, it’s a lowbrow exploitation film but it’s one that’s filtered through a very stylized, art house sensibility. Don’t be swayed by the negative mainstream reviews and general fanboy silence. There’s something special in this one…

Here’ s a German clip from the explosive climax. So if you don’t want it spoiled…don’t watch.

And here’s the groovy, non-Eno theme song, cut from the US print (and no, it’s not the same Paul Williams you’re probably thinking of…)

Note: portions if this essay appeared in my Blood Spattered Book, from Midnight Marquee Press.

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Teaser and First Look at New ‘Ozploitation’ Flick SCARE CAMPAIGN

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Teaser and First Look at New ‘Ozploitation’ Flick SCARE CAMPAIGN

SHOCK gives you an eyeful of the new Ozploitation film SCARE CAMPAIGN.

“Ozploitation” is alive and well and spurting red stuff every which way in the new film SCARE CAMPAIGN.

The movie is written and directed by bothers Colin and Cameron Cairnes, the duo behind the ballistic Aussie shocker 100 BLOODY ACRES and stars THE VISIT’s Olivia De Jonge.

Here’s the official synopsis:

“Popular TV prank show, Scare Campaign, has been entertaining audiences for the last five years with its mix of old school scares and hidden camera fun. But as we enter a new age of online TV, the producers find themselves up against a new hard-edged web series which makes their show look decidedly quaint. It’s time to up the ante, but will the team go too far this time, and are they about to prank the wrong guy?”

Now, with that, buckle in…because here’s the teaser trailer:

SCARE CAMPAIGN will be released in 2016 and is opening Australia’s Monster Fest this Thursday, November 26th.

More on the film as we get it, but in the meantime, follow the SCARE CAMPAIGN crew at their official Facebook page.

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KINKY FRANKENSTEIN! Five Sexy, Sleazy and Kinky Frankenstein Flicks!

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KINKY FRANKENSTEIN! Five Sexy, Sleazy and Kinky Frankenstein Flicks!

SHOCK strips down and looks at the kinkier side of Frankenstein on film.

Last week, to celebrate the impending release of the big-budget monster-making movie VICTOR FRANKENSTEIN, SHOCK stitched together a list of 5 Frankenstein flicks that, when it came to capturing the essence of Mary Shelley’s landmark novel, failed miserably. You can read that list HERE.

This week, we take a look at the sexier, skankier side of Frankenstein on film. Undo your belt a notch and relax…

The very nature of the Frankenstein story lends itself to kink. It’s a story of obsession, of madness; of domination, submission and narcissism; of clandestine rituals of necrophila-tinted body-snatching and flesh-sculpting. So it makes sense to see a strain of cinema that trades in the dirtier side of the tale, exploiting people’s lust for the taboo and delivering the rough stuff with spurting, sanguinary glee.

The following list is by no means definitive. Rather it is a selection of five of our favorite “Frankie Gets Freaky” flicks that really electrified our organs.

Have a look…

HORROR OF FRANKENSTEIN (1970)

As Hammer Studios changed guards and tried to re-invent themselves for a more explicitly inclined decade, HORROR OF FRANKENSTEIN was their bid to both re-boot their Frankenstein franchise and continue their (mostly unsuccessful) grooming of actor Ralph Bates as their “new” Peter Cushing. HORROR OF FRANKENSTEIN is essentially a campy, cruel and naughtier version of CURSE OF FRANKENSTEIN and, as such, has long received a bum rap from Hammer and Frankenstein fans alike. But there’s so much to savor in this Jimmy Sangster-directed sleaze opera, especially when viewing it as the black comedy it most certainly is. Bates’ spoiled, arrogant and sociopathic Baron sleeps around, kills without conscience and, when his homicidal, blasphemous experiments flunk out, he just kind of shrugs it all off. Dirty, rough and tons of  fun.

LADY FRANKENSTEIN (1971)

Roger Corman threw some dough at this Italian exploitation gem (released via his New World imprint) that rarely gets the dues it deserves. Directed by Mel Welles, a regular Corman actor who most will remember for his turn as Mushnick in Corman’s LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS, this beautifully designed, ultra-Gothic horror gem stars Joseph Cotton as the good Baron who leaves his lab and life’s work to his buxom daughter Tania Frankenstein, played by the great Sara Bay aka Rosalba Neri (THE DEVIL’S WEDDING NIGHT). BLOODY PIT OF HORROR legend Mickey Hargitay also shows up in this lively, erotic, leering and atmospheric flick (with a great score by Allesandro Allesandroni) that ultimately serves as a showcase for Neri’s ample attributes and earthy sexuality. And dig that wild final sex scene!

FLESH FOR FRANKENSTEIN (aka ANDY WARHOL’S FRANKENSTEIN, 1973)

Director Paul Morrissey (with help from Italian legend Antonio Margheriti, though the jury is still out as to how much help) helmed this operatically sexual and perverse 3D trash masterpiece whose campy, lurid leer pumps up against rich production design, gorgeous photography and a sumptuous Claudio Gizzi score. Udo Kier gives his signature performance as the humorless (and therefore hilarious) necrophiliac Baron Frankenstein, who fist-fucks his female creation while making a superman creature and pontificating loudly to his perverted assistant (Arno Juerging). The Warhol connection came from the film getting Andy’s blessing, seeing as both Morrissey and cast member Joe Dallessandro (who is fantastically wooden – in every sense – as a seemingly lost Brooklyn stud) were borrowed from his “Factory”; otherwise this Carlo Ponti production is pure Eurotrash gold. A must see in 3D, with Kier’s spleen dripping onto your lap and male and female parts thrusting from the screen.

FRANKENSTEIN: ITALIAN STYLE (1975)

Jenny Tamburi, the lovely lass from many an Italian sexploitation flick (and so memorable in Rino Di Silverstro’s WOMEN IN CELL BLOCK 7) is the sexiest thing about this ultra-tacky and sleazy sex comedy/horror flick. In it, the good Baron builds a beast with, you guessed it, a really big penis. And when the monster gets loose…he really gets LOOSE! Absolutely an attempt to capture the absurd humor of Mel Brooks’ YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN, FRANKENSTEIN: ITALIAN STYLE is shot in color, with a goofy looking monster that looks like late-period Elvis crossed with Karloff and plenty of goofy, kinky sex and female nudity. Interestingly, the film’s German title is CASSANOVA FRANKENSTEIN, which is the name of Geoffrey Rush’s villain from the film MYSTERY MEN.

FUCKENSTEIN (2012)

Conceptual punk/porn Princess and entrepreneur Joanna Angel is, er, behind this colorfully titled XXX flick, a harder-than-core porno that is rendered in black and white and boasts – for porn – handsome costume design. Of course, said costumes don’t stay on long as Baron Frankenstein (adult actor James Deen) builds a stud-monster to double-penetrate his insatiable wife (Angel). Plenty of penetration of all sorts ensues, though viewers may quickly lose interest. Then suddenly get interested again. Then once more lose interest. Then regain that interest and…well, it’s a porno. You get it.

Honorable Mention: THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW (1075)

No nudity to speak of, but this ribald musical, the ultimate cult film, is a send up Hammer’s Frankenstein films (especially during its dynamic creations scene) by way of 50’s drive-in culture. It’s the Frankenstein mythos represented as a gender-bending, rock and roll romp and , despite its pop-culture over-saturation, it’s still a cheeky,  imaginative and important kinky delight.

Feel free to fill in the spaces below with YOUR favorite “Kinky Frankenstein” flicks!

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Contest! Win a Copy of Monstermatt Patterson’s BRIDE OF HA-HA HORROR Jokebook!

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Contest! Win a Copy of Monstermatt Patterson’s BRIDE OF HA-HA HORROR Jokebook!

Win a copy of the world’s best/worst horror joke book, BRIDE OF HA-HA HORROR!

Artist and writer Monstermatt Patterson is the Dark Overlord of awful horror-centric jokes and pitiful puns. And that’s why we love him…

BRIDE OF HA-HA HORROR is Patterson’s follow-up to his groan-inducing first collection of forehead smacking horror movie-oriented puns and lowbrow jokes, HA-HA HORROR and, like that book, the follow-up is designed to make you the life (death) of the party.

Of course, there’s the risk that instead of slayin’ them…they’ll slay YOU after you unload Patterson’s torrent of terrible (and therefore awesome) gags.

SHOCK wants to throw a copy of BRIDE OF HA-HA HORROR at you. Ready? Duck!

To win, email chris.alexander@shocktillyoudrop.com with the words MAKE ‘EM LAUGH! in the header.

The (un)lucky winner will be chosen at random.

And to hang out with the talented and witty master of bad jokes (and great art!) drop by his official Facebook page today!

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Think of the Children! Examining ‘Pre-Code’ Horror and its Influence on Cinema

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Think of the Children! Examining ‘Pre-Code’ Horror and its Influence on Cinema

SHOCK riffs on the horrors of early ‘Hays Code’ Hollywood and examines their effect on contemporary films.

“I wish to join the Legion of Decency, which condemns vile and unwholesome moving pictures. I unite with all who protest against them as a grave menace to youth, to home life, to country and to religion. I condemn absolutely those salacious motion pictures which, with other degrading agencies, are corrupting public morals and promoting a sex mania in our land… Considering these evils, I hereby promise to remain away from all motion pictures except those which do not offend decency and Christian morality.”
—Catholic Legion of Decency pledge

Pre-Code cinema is a term used to refer to films made after 1930 and before 1934 when the infamous Motion Picture Production Code or Hays Code (named after Will H. Hays then-president of the Motion Picture Producers and Distributors of America) was implemented. The Code was a set of puritanical moral guidelines used to dictate the values which Hollywood and its films were meant to extol. The government was realizing that despite their initial beliefs, films (which at that point were just beginning to use sound) were here to stay and were becoming the predominant form of social entertainment. Films delighted, scared and intrigued their audiences and the government wanted to ensure that the correct morals and beliefs were being shown on screen. The Code was drafted in 1930 but not enforced until 1934 the four year period in-between offered up bevvy of scandalous and sensational films everything from graphic horror films to bloody gangster films to pseudo-feminist women led films. These pre-Code films, as they became known, were emblematic of the social decay and “unhealthy” attitudes which were exactly what the government feared. These four years which constitute the pre-Code era were a time when studios pushed the limits, testing what would be acceptable and what would get axed. Depictions of violence, trauma, and sexuality were rampant during this time and horror films were no exception. Some of the most bizarre, gruesome and nihilistic horror films were made in this time in the face of the on-coming conservatism which was about the hit the film industry.

The ‘Pre-Code’ era began almost in tandem with the Great Depression in the United States. Movies became popular entertainment because of their ability to provide escapism for audiences who were facing desperate times. Horror films in particular played up elements of the fantastic to help cut through the darkness of the stories of the films allowing the audience to engage with something shocking and more terrifying than everyday life. German Expressionism which had first made an impact on the horror genre with Robert Wiene’s THE CABINET OF DR. CALIGARI (1919) was in part brought to America by Carl Laemmle a native German who swiftly rose through the ranks of Universal Studios who was instrumental in establishing the Universal Monsters. These films not only focused on the heightened atmosphere of monsters mainly from literature such as DRACULA (1931) and FRANKENSTEIN (1931) but making stars out of their monsters (Lugosi, Karloff) creating a proven track record that audiences continued to pay to see.

Universal, however, was not the only studio to get in on the horror game. MGM would make the iconic pre-Code horror film Tod Browning’s FREAKS (1932) which was banned in certain parts of America due to the content of the film and because the film featured people who performed in sideshows rather than loading prosthetics on actors. Paramount found tawdry success with Rouben Mamoulian’s DR. JECKYL AND MR. HYDE (1931) which dealt with taboo sexuality and the studio proceeded to produce a string of iconic pre-Code horror films such as ISLAND OF LOST SOULS (1932) and MURDERS AT THE ZOO (1933). These films were notable, in part, because of their political incorrectness and because they conflated man with animal – the idea that society had been bred into us and was inherently unnatural. In fact, much of what the Hays Code would attempt to do is breed the ideal society. Pre-code films rejected those notions in an attempt to showcase the reality of fear. Pre-Code horror films showcased violence, prejudice, rape and a multitude of other taboos. The Hays Code was replaced by the MPAA rating system in 1968 after the Code became untenable to enforce with the increasing amount of films being produced every year.

The lasting influence of the pre-Code horror films can be seen in American horror when the country was in crisis. In the early 1970s when America was careening towards the end of the Vietnam War and was attempting to comprehend the violence of the Charles Manson murders and the instability of the government exemplified by Richard Nixon, horror films reacted by creating dizzying, morbid visions of the American Dream gone terribly wrong with films such as THE LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT (1972), THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (1974) and HALLOWEEN (1978) among others. A similar trend would emerge in America and internationally in the wake of the September 11th attacks with the so-called “Torture Porn” trend with films such as HOSTEL (2005) and A SERBIAN FILM (2010) as well as the films of New French Extremity like IRREVERSIBLE (2002), HIGH TENSION (2003), and MARTYRS (2008).

Pre-Code films were an anticipatory reaction to the moralizing that films faced for decades following the 1934 implementation. While some films made during the Hays Code period such as Jacques Tourneur’s CAT PEOPLE (1942) offered a restrained subversion of those morals, pre-Code horror films are still shocking to this day. They depict anger and dissatisfaction with life which was more relevant to audiences than the beatific sanitization of the American Dream. The morals preached through the Hays Code were never attainable. They were idealized dreams of what the government wanted their citizens to be, pre-Code films depicted and offered a blueprint for the, occasionally, terrifying reality that Americans faced.

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